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Long Patrol Academy

A Fanfic crossover of Redwall/The Police Academy, I am working on. Hope you all enjoy it :)

Book 1: New Precinct- Redwall Abbey

Very upbeat music begins to play as the title comes up, saying "Long Patrol Academy 1: Redwall" as the upbeat Police Academy begins to play. showing Mossflower Woods by a birds eye view, slowly going towards the river till Redwall Abbey is in sight.

Two officers walk into Mossflower and towards Redwall, one officer was a mouse while the other was a fox, the fox looked to the mouse. "PROCTOR.....hurry up or I come down and drag your sorry tail to our new precinct, do you understand me!?" The fox glared at Officer Lt Proctor.

Proctor looked to the fox and smiles. "Oh golly sir, do we really have to be there in time for Abbot Mordalfus's feast, it won't start in the next 3 hours.....Captaine Harris, sir."  the mouse cheerfully smiled at his captaine. they continued to walk towards Redwall Abbey, prepared for anything that might come their way.

"I know that, I do not want to be late, so I can show the Abbot, that I am more on time than Lassard and his band of buffoons, the last thing I need, is another moron telling me I do a poor job, at coming in on time, for once I show them up, and impress Mordalfus at the same time, understand now Proctor?" Capt Harris turns and looked at the dopey Lt Proctor, folding his arms.

"Yeah, I get it now sir, oh I hear Cluny the Scourge was killed at that abbey just yesterday, I heard it from a friend, just before we left for Mossflower Country." Lt Proctor said, looking to Capt Harris. "Good thing we didn't have such a criminal like him back in the city, that would of been a real bummer, for Lassard and his team, but not for you, you'd catch him, before he could hold the mayor up for a hostage."

"Ohh, so true, I hate rats and if that scourge was alive, I would arrest him and get a promotion for capturing the sicko, and with help with a real professional team, chosen by me, and not that nimrod Lassard. And if those nimrods show me up at the feast tonight, ohhh then they better hide from me, when it comes to work." The fox gives a nasty smirk.

Meanwhile unaware to Harris and Proctor, Lessard's team had arrived to the abbey about 3 hours ago. Jones helped in the abbey kitchen, along with a few mouse maidens. Constance walked in, Jones made an impression of huge foot  steps being made by Constance. "OK, now who keeps on doing that?" the badger turns around,everyone kept on doing their work.

"Doing what Constance? We all working here, even I, a humble officer am doing my part to helping you lovely people get ready for the feast tonight." Jones smiled cheerfully while peeling carrots and handing them to Jennie, who is sitting next to him. the badger nods and walked off, Jones again made impersonations of huge footsteps being made, slowly fading away,as Constance walked off.

The mouse maids all giggle and returned to working. "You very talented Jonesy, though kinda mean playing little jokes like that on others." one of the sisters said to Jones.

"Mean, nah, just a little fun, it cheers others up, and just you wait, the next beast that walks in here, will not know what is going on." The officer laughed, continuing peeling the carrots. Basil steps into the kitchen. "Afternoon all, keeping good I suppose." The hare smiled cheerfully, greeting everyone with a smile, when he bends down to pick up a carrot on the floor, Jones intimidated farting noises, causing Basil to shot up straight. "MY WORD.....pardon me ladies. I've never done that before, especially not in front of lovely ladies like yourselves." the hare blushed with embarrassment.

The maidens all laughed and giggled, Jones got up and smiled. "No worries friend, it could happen to anyone, best thing to remember. It is not a big of a deal, if you get a little gassy every now and then." Jones tapped Basil on the shoulder and walks off,

"What a decent honest chap he is, rather nice to have new comers like him, here in our beloved Abbey, eh wot wot?" The hare laughed, walking off in thee same direction Jones left in.

Meanwhile in the garden, Hooks stood in front of a group of Redwallers, explaining what the city is like. " one of the things you must know, be sure to keep a whistle with you, just in case some bad people come to cause trouble for you, just take this whistle and blow in it like this." Hooks blew her whistle loudly. "Now remember these are to be used for emergencies only, a...and if you already know how to whistle, then just whistle, like how I showed you"

Few Redwallers applaud Hooks's demonstration, Matthias walked up as Hooks sat back down, the young mouse smiled. "Thank you for that demonstration Hooks. Its always nice to learn a new thing from another beast, now here is Tackleberry, who is going to demonstrate how to use a noisy weapon, called a gun? Ahh, sounds interesting, now...." Matthias is rudely interrupted by the sound of the abbey gates being opened.

Everyone turned around to see Proctor and Harris walking inside the abbey. "Hello everyone, I have finally arrived to this wonderful Abbey you all call Redwall, I must apologize for being late, SOMEONE. glares at Proctor. Decided he wanted to get something to eat from a local tavern. Anyway, I have much things to do, so for the meantime if you don't mind, I be in my chambers unpacking and getting ready for this evening." The fox turned around and walked off, Proctor followed after him.

Constance folded her arms "Hmph, who left that fox in here? We already dealt with a fox, we don't need another one here." Few others nodded in agreement, remembering when they had to deal with Chickenhound and Sela a while ago, not to forget the foxes were also responsible for old Methuselah's death.

Jones did an impression of a crowd booing as Harris and Proctor left for their chambers, as soon they were out of sight, Jones stopped, everyone began laughing.

"Would it be alright if I shot those two blighters with that doo hicky of yours? Last thing we need is a fox and a mouse stealing things from the abbey, don't ya know?" Basil said jokingly to Tackleberry, pointing to his gun.

"Well if you want to use a 9mm gun to take down a pair of trouble makers, be my guest, well you just might want to take out the blanks first." Tackleberry took out the blank rounds from his gun and puts a live round in.

"Umm no thanks, Basil was joking, weren't you Basil? Last thing we need is you fooling around with another beast's weapon." Matthias said, dragging Basil away from the group.

Basil laughed. "Don't worry Matthias me boy, I wasn't really going to use that noisy gone founded weapon, but it would of been useful against Cluny the Scourge, if these good chums came during that time."

"Well that would be nice Basil, but have you heard how loud those things are? Not really something you want to wield, even if it was a last resort." Matthias sighs, looking to Basil. "Some people in my town used these weapons when Cluny came, I don't remember seeing who, but I remembered the terrible sound they made."

"Don't worry Matthias, I doubt we need to use those silly gun thingy's at all, that Long Patrol lot will be using them, that reminds me, we better get them together and tell them not to use those weapons around the abbot, you know how the abbot feels about weapons of sorts?" The hare looked to the Warrior of Redwall for a moment.

Matthias thought for a moment then looked back. "Yes, remember Abbot Mortimer served in The great war of Mossflower, and after that he never wanted to use any kind of weapon again, Brother Alf was with him, they both agreed to never use weapons of any kind ever again, if I know Abbot Mordalfus,  he will refuse to allow the Long Patrollers to use those guns."

After unpacking and coming down from his chambers, Harris overheard Basil and Matthias's conversation, he comes around the corner, interrupting the conversation. "If you and Bugs Bunny don't like how us police officers run things, you can take it up with Commandant Lassard or me, Frankly I do not need an opinion from a Micky Mouse reject or a Bugs Bunny ninny like you two, now if you excuse me, I have important work to do. MOVE IT MOVE IT MOVE IT!" The fox yelled walking passed Matthias and Basil.

"Why the nerve! I do not look like this Bugs Bunny bloke, whoever he is, nor do you look like a Micky Mouse, what nonsense talk is that fox trying to get at, hmm?" Basil glared, every annoyed with Captine Harris.

Matthias scowled, very annoyed at the remark. "I hope HE leaves soon, that Harris character is not a pleasent beast to be around, even if he is in the long Patrol."

Book 1: Chapter 2- The Feast.

Later on that evening, everyone got ready for the feast, as for Matthias, he sat in the kitchen and spoke to Cornflower. "And he called me a Micky Mouse reject, whatever that is suppose to mean, he even insulted Basil, I am telling you Cornflower, that Harris is nothing but a rude arrigant fox that should be thrown out of the abbey."

"Hmm, I understand your frustration Matthias, but you need to be the better beast, even if he does insult you, don't let him get to you so easily, take my advice Matthias, rude beasts were raised poorly by their parents, but we been raised by good beasts, like the Abbot and Constance, They always have shown us how to behave around other beasts, even rude beasts like this Harris guy, but his friend Proctor, he is a lot more nicer than Capt Harris is. He must be the only one out of the two who isn't so, well down right mean."

"You know what? You are right Cornflower!" the young mouse jumped from the counter and hugs Cornflower. "You always know the right thing to say, I better get going, the Abbot wants me to help with tonight's festivities, I promised him, I'd help out." The mouse grinned, he ran out and heads for the Great Hall.

Cornflower giggled while sshe continued working. "My pep talks always make him feel better, maybe I might start working on a book about this kind of stuff."


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